


poison pen

by antiquescissors



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: F/F, Light Angst, kinda sad, touriko - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-03 04:39:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14561058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antiquescissors/pseuds/antiquescissors
Summary: And for that reason, I didn't kiss you. Sorry. I would have at least tried, but I know you hate it when people love you.





	poison pen

**Author's Note:**

> poison pen-
> 
> A letter or note containing unpleasant, abusive or malicious statements or accusations about the recipient or a third party. It is usually sent anonymously. In the term "poison pen." The word poison is used figuratively rather than literally.

I guess this is an apology letter. You'll find out why later. It's just kind of hard to get it all together, mostly because I'm so tired. I just felt the need, you know? I felt like I had to. You're probably confused because I'm rambling like a freak. Listen: I need to tell you something very important, and I don't know how to tell you without telling you a story. So here's a story. 

I was walking by :Re the other day, which, by the way, is such a cool little place! I went there even before it was refurnished and all, but then I didn't go for the scenery. If I'm being honest (which I've got to be in a letter like this), I mostly went for you. Not that I didn't like the food, but I'm not much of a coffee fan unless it has a gallon of creamer. It looked like Anteiku specialized in black coffee. 

Anyway, I was walking, and I saw you inside the restaurant, arguing with a customer. No doubt they'd come back angry, but that's just the kind of person you are. When I saw it, it made me angry. I deal with customers like that all the time. There really is no time left for politeness when customers talk to you like you're subhuman, huh? Sometimes I was less than polite. I could understand why you, especially, would be less than polite; this guy was shouting at you so loudly, I could hear it from outside the building. I thought about how I would feel if a guy shouted at me like that. I'm not going to lie--I've thought about some mean stuff before. Of course, I'd never throw coffee in a customer's face. That's what you did next. You splashed coffee on his face. I winced, because I knew he would go for the manager faster than you could say, "He started it."

Basically, I knew that the guy would be pretty pissed, and so I felt for you. I wanted to run in there and defend you. Hah! I can barely even  _write_ stuff like that with a straight face. I know you can defend yourself. I also know you can defend other people, and I don't know if you knew, but that's a little more important to me, so...please keep it up. I like it when you fight for other people, like some kind of guardian. Protector of the poor. You know?

I wanted to defend you. I wanted to go in there and protect you. Right now, you're probably thinking, Yoriko, why? but you know why. You know why I feel so inclined to protect you. 

I just walked past. I didn't even go in, because I knew you didn't want to see me, but it's just funny. I was thinking of other times when I would have liked to visit you. Here's an example: 

It was back when :Re was Anteiku, and it was nothing special, either. It wasn't a bad place or anything, but it wasn't a super fancy restaurant. It was more of a comfortable, sit-down place where you would have brunch with a group of friends. I didn't really see the point in brunch, and neither did you, so we just drank coffee on your breaks. Of course, I would make you some food, and you would eat it. Then you would go to the bathroom. For a long time, I thought that you had an eating disorder because of this. Oops! Leave it to me to be stupid like that. 

I was walking into the little cafe, and I was greeted by Yoshimura. I asked him how you were doing, and he said you were fine. It was good to know! I went around, looking for you. Hinami greeted me, too, of course. It's kind of crazy to think of how she's grown up. It's insane to think of who she is. I know who she was then. She was a little girl who loved to read, and she had the kindest face. She told me that you had a new bird. I asked for the bird's name, and she told me that you named it  _Hetare._ That was kind of funny. 

When I finally reached you, you were upstairs, sitting down with the bird. 

I said that I thought you were scared of birds. You didn't say anything. I just sat down next to you. We sat in silence for a little while, but it wasn't super comfortable. There was something that I think you might have wanted to say, or do...

After a while, you asked me if I wanted something. Typical you. Of course I wanted something. Why would I go to this shop, where the scenery is average and the coffee is black and the food is nothing special, unless I thought there was something worth visiting? Someone worth seeing? It kills me now to think that you didn't know. It killed me then. You were trying to be polite, and of course, now I know what it's like to fake politeness. I'm a  _waitress._ But it just made me so upset that you felt like you had to give me all the pretend niceties that you gave to everyone else who went to that coffee shop. It bothered me to think that that was the way you thought of me. Not as a friend who you could tell stuff to. Not as a trustworthy being who could bear the weight of whatever it was you wanted to say. Your hand brushed past mine. I don't even know if you did that because you liked me, or you didn't like me, or because you knew or what. Maybe your hand just did that. 

I told you that I just wanted to see what was up with you. 

You said, nothing much. 

I said, cool, and I left. 

It just made me think. Now, I know that if I had done what I had wanted to do for years, you would have been angry. Now, I know that you would have yelled at me. Back then, I just thought, she's so cold. She's like ice, she's so cold. And for that reason, I didn't kiss you. Sorry. I would have at least tried, but I know you hate it when people love you. 

The point of this whole thing is, I walked past :Re the other day. It looks nice. I like what you've done with the place. I would have gone in there, but I'm the kind of girl who only drinks coffee if it has a gallon of creamer, and I only ever went in there for you. 


End file.
